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But perhaps I was TOO nice, because it was always the same thing: “I just think of you as a good friend.” I’d had a girlfriend here and there and sometimes it would last a few months, but there was never one that I felt like she was ‘the one’.

But surely at some point I’d rush into a burning building or pull someone out of a wrecked, burning car moments before it exploded and save the hot young woman from certain death and she would fall in love with me. Indeed, most people I helped rescue were elderly, extremely obese, ugly, married, or MEN.

The fire chief pulled me aside on my very first day on the job to give me a piece of advice.

He said, “Listen kid: you are going to get a lot of advice over the next few years from these guys.

In my youth, I always imagined that I would marry my high school sweetheart and make a fortune working as a fireman. But then again, perhaps I wasn’t so far off the mark. I knew what I wanted to do with my life and it didn’t include college: I wanted to be a fireman.

To me, it was the ultimate real life “superhero” job.

Some of it will be good; some won’t be worth a shit.

But I’m going to give you the one bit of advice that you had better take.” He just looked me dead in my eyes to let me know how serious he was. He continued, “Get you an outlet.” I didn’t understand and it must have shown on my face. The ones that are gone before you get there aren’t the ones you’ll see at night; it’s the ones that die in front of you that will haunt.

As with many guys in their mid 20’s, this was nothing unusual, but I was getting bored with this routine.

Instead of going to my typical sites, I began looking for something new.

You don’t want that.” Then he whispered to me in confidence, “Look at Brian over there; he didn’t find one, so alcohol found him. That’s why we call him ‘Flush’; it’s after the poker hand and what he’s doing with his life—flushing it down the toilet. ” I nodded in complete understanding and asked, “What did you find? For reasons I could never figure out, I was never very successful with the ladies.

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