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He was a 44 year-old trust fund guy who lived with his mother and had never married.

He entered therapy because he wanted to learn why he hadn't been able to form a lasting relationship.

There's a place for this kind of sex, but it's also the most primitive, least evolved form of sex.

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Couples who have Marital Sex like something about each other as people.

Or at least they did at one time, when they first got together. The good part is that your relationship is more humanly evolved, and contains the possibility of evolving towards Making Love.

First, some clarification about what I mean by each term.

" It really is about the differences between "Hook-Up Sex," "Marital Sex," and "Making Love." I've found that confusion about those differences play out in many of the conflicts people experience in their sexual-romantic relationships, no matter what their ages or kinds of relationships.

So, learning new sex techniques or acquiring new sexual knowledge wasn't going to elevate their sexual relationship beyond Marital Sex.

Sometimes Marital Sex includes a Hook-Up sexual experience - perhaps when on a vacation, or aided by ingesting substances, legal or illegal.

In Hook-Up Sex you and your partner use each other's bodies for your own pleasure.

It can be extremely intense and arousing, especially when you feel lust towards a new partner.

For example, Julie didn't talk very openly with Tom about what she wanted, sexually.

She carried the residue of shame about revealing her sexual desires, shame that originated in her relationship with her mother.

And "Making Love" is a different kind of experience that transcends both of the other two kinds.

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